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Time may be a great healer, but it's a lousy beautician. ~Author Unknown
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Wisdom doesn't necessarily come with age. Sometimes age just shows up all by itself. ~Tom Wilson
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Middle age is having a choice between two temptations and choosing the one that'll get you home earlier. ~Dan Bennett
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Never raise your hand to your kids. It leaves your groin unprotected. ~Red Buttons
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Middle age is having a choice between two temptations and choosing the one that'll get you home earlier. ~Dan Bennett
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There is still no cure for the common birthday. ~John Glenn
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Blessed indeed is the man who hears many gentle voices call him father! ~Lydia M. Child, Philothea: A Romance, 1836
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A father carries pictures where his money used to be. ~Author Unknown
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I still have a full deck; I just shuffle slower now. ~Author Unknown
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We know we're getting old when the only thing we want for our birthday is not to be reminded of it. ~Author Unknown
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First you forget names; then you forget faces; then you forget to zip up your fly; and then you forget to unzip your fly. ~Branch Rickey
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We know we're getting old when the only thing we want for our birthday is not to be reminded of it. ~Author Unknown
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Spread the diaper in the position of the diamond with you at bat. Then fold second base down to home and set the baby on the pitcher's mound. Put first base and third together, bring up home plate and pin the three together. Of course, in case of rain, you gotta call the game and start all over again. ~Jimmy Piersal, on how to diaper a baby, 1968
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You're not 40, you're eighteen with 22 years experience. ~Author Unknown
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First you forget names; then you forget faces; then you forget to zip up your fly; and then you forget to unzip your fly. ~Branch Rickey
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A diplomat is a man who always remembers a woman's birthday but never remembers her age. ~Robert Frost
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My father used to play with my brother and me in the yard. Mother would come out and say, "You're tearing up the grass." "We're not raising grass," Dad would reply. "We're raising boys." ~Harmon Killebrew
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They say that age is all in your mind. The trick is keeping it from creeping down into your body. ~Author Unknown
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Blessed indeed is the man who hears many gentle voices call him father! ~Lydia M. Child, Philothea: A Romance, 1836
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It is not flesh and blood but the heart which makes us fathers and sons. ~Johann Schiller
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My father used to play with my brother and me in the yard. Mother would come out and say, "You're tearing up the grass." "We're not raising grass," Dad would reply. "We're raising boys." ~Harmon Killebrew
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In childhood, we yearn to be grown-ups. In old age, we yearn to be kids. It just seems that all would be wonderful if we didn't have to celebrate our birthdays in chronological order. ~Robert Brault, www.robertbrault.com
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You are only young once, but you can stay immature indefinitely. ~Ogden Nash
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Henry James once defined life as that predicament which precedes death, and certainly nobody owes you a debt of honor or gratitude for getting him into that predicament. But a child does owe his father a debt, if Dad, having gotten him into this peck of trouble, takes off his coat and buckles down to the job of showing his son how best to crash through it. ~Clarence Budington Kelland
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Birthdays are good for you. Statistics show that the people who have the most live the longest. ~Larry Lorenzoni
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It is not flesh and blood but the heart which makes us fathers and sons. ~Johann Schiller
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It would seem that something which means poverty, disorder and violence every single day should be avoided entirely, but the desire to beget children is a natural urge. ~Phyllis Diller
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May you live to be a hundred yearsWith one extra year to repent.~Author Unknown
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My father used to play with my brother and me in the yard. Mother would come out and say, "You're tearing up the grass." "We're not raising grass," Dad would reply. "We're raising boys." ~Harmon Killebrew
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Thanks to modern medical advances such as antibiotics, nasal spray, and Diet Coke, it has become routine for people in the civilized world to pass the age of 40, sometimes more than once. ~Dave Barry, "Your Disintegrating Body," Dave Barry Turns 40, 1990
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